Since you no longer live with your ‘rents, why would you want to keep a traditional pad? A crazy crib is what you should be aiming at — not some tired box for squares. Swingers need freedom of (interior) design. A comfortable boxspring and mattress combo should comprise the focal point in an active bachelor pad. The typical cat spends a third of his live groovin’ in the sheets, so comfort is paramount. For those who like it rough — and don’t mind the rug burns — the choice to do away with the bed entirely is another option. But once you make that decision, live with it. (Ouch!) And while we’re on the subject, furniture that moves is a plus because it represents your physical nature. A Murphy bed — if you can find one today — is the most with its out-of-sight disappearing act. It’ll impress even the most jaded Chelsea stud.

Eighty-six grandma’s sofa and find yourself a hip Charles Eames lounge chair and matching ottoman (circa 1950). Tiki lamps — a main-stay in any lounge lizard’s pad — will look great in your bedroom as will any other lounge-oriented item, like glass beaded screens, pole lamps and vertical Venetian blinds. “Anything that was on the set of the 1958 movie Auntie Mame is cool pickings for any bachelor pad,” says Ricky Ritzel. ” George Peppard’s upstairs apartment in Breakfast at Tiffany’s is also an example of something that is very trendy, very cool!” As for wall coverings, Ritzel recommends wallpaper with a sparkling metallic personality of its own.

Aside from being functional, a cat’s crib needs to be comfortable. Hand-me-downs are okay as long as they’re not from Uncle Harvey’s garage from West Nyack. (If there’s no way around that horrible truth, a cat’s got to lie. Tell your lounge buddies you got your goods from a dumpster situated behind Hugh Hefner’s Playboy Mansion. Not only will that impress them, but it’ll also get you more overnight guests. Know what I mean?) Hey, the lounge lizard doesn’t have time to sweat the small stuff and living in New York doesn’t allow a cat much room for error. So design your ultra-groovy bachelor pad right the first time and you won’t be crying later. —JJ